I have been coughing for a month and it is probably been the most frustrating illness I have had in quite some time.  I have a cold.  Or, probably more accurately, I suffer from “the common cold”.  I wish it were more dramatic, that descriptor.  Something like “The Phlegmatic Flare-up” or “The Pulmonary Piranha”, because at times it feels as if evil little fish are swimming around in my lungs causing all kinds of pain and mischief.  But, alas, I am left with no other categorization than “I have a cold.”  It’s not a very impressive illness and everyone seems to respond by saying “Oh, me too.”

Sometimes, the most emotionally difficult hurdles to jump are seemingly the smaller ones.  The co-worker that talks behind your back, the friend who stands you up, the spouse that just doesn’t seem to care about what you’re going through to the extent that you want him or her to.  I find that it’s not the dramatic challenges and difficulties that are the most dangerous; it’s the little ones that don’t seem to be or shouldn’t be so hard.  No one can fully understand or comprehend that the small and seemingly insignificant difficulties that we encounter every day are the ones that sap our energies the most.  And it’s during those times that we need to be most on our guard.  You see, the common cold can become pneumonia if it is not dealt with appropriately.  And the small stressors can become roots of bitterness and anger that can lead to bad decisions and chronically bad attitudes. 

Solomon stated in his “Song of Songs” that it’s the little foxes that spoil the vine and the Apostle Paul writes in I Corinthians 10:13 that: “No temptation has seized you except what is common to man [there’s that word ‘common’ again!].  And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear.  But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.”  So my encouragement to you is not to let those “little” frustrations fester and begin to fetter you.  Instead, give them the appropriate attention they need, and then, before God and in the presence of a trusted friend or counselor, allow these wounds to be appropriately dressed and healed and may your physical and emotional “colds” soon be healed!

Jim

There are times in life when NOT doing something can usher in a sacred moment.  I had one recently.  I learned a lot from this moment, and I want to share. 

My energetic, bright, and confident daughter brought me a few pages of an essay that I had seen her working on for the past few weeks.  She was exceptionally excited about this essay that is a true story of the scariest moment of her life.  I was a character in this essay, and I could see in her eyes her need for me to approve of her work.  She was proud and delighted to share it with her mom.  I sensed in that moment that in believing in her work, she would feel my love for her.  How I would value her work was tied to how I felt about her. I could see it.

I read her words out loud.  There was so much energy and life in the story. I saw how excited she was to tell this story…but I also saw typos. I saw misspelled words. I saw incorrect placement of commas. I saw how the story wasn’t exactly how it happened.

And I had a choice.  I had a choice to use my strengths (insight, assistance, discernment to make changes for the better…people pay me to do these things) or to RESTRAIN.  Without a doubt, it was God working in me in that moment.  I had been learning about the Discipline of Restraint from one of my mentors, Alicia Britt Chole.  I had worked to build up the muscle of restraint.  This, my friend, was a test. 

I looked at her, mirroring back to her the excitement that she was oozing, and I told her how proud of her I was. I told her that the story kept me on the edge of my seat even when I knew the ending. I gave her a hug.  I celebrated her work, and I celebrated her. 

Fast forward a week or two.  As I picked up my daughters from school, my daughter told me about her day.  She said that her teacher read her essay to the class.  The teacher praised my daughter, saying that in the history of 25 years of teaching, this was the best essay she has ever read from one of her students. 

I, of course, was so pleased that she did well. But I was even more thankful that I had not been a critical, disparaging voice echoing in her heart.  Had I corrected her, she would have remembered that her mother only saw the negative.  The discipline of restraint saved my daughter the belief that her mother didn’t approve of her. 

I sat back and didn’t say what I thought.  I held my tongue and offered my heart.  I have to say it is one of my proudest moments in the last year, and it is all because I used RESTRAINT.

I will continue to learn to get out of the way, to give less of myself. 

Next challenge:  critiquing my husband’s sermons.

Laura

Now that you've got a bit of this year behind you, I know a couple things are likely true. First: you can already write 12 at the end of each date with no more than a momentary consideration. Second: if you even bothered thinking about personal resolutions, you've already forgotten most of them. Happy new year.

How would you like to try something a little different this year? Instead of just thinking about who you'll be a year from now, send a message to that one-year-older you. You can write anything you want and have it sent to you at any future time you want, but here's what I'm going to challenge you to do...

• Go to futureme.org and enter your email address (make sure you use and email address you're planning to keep during the time period) and subject into the form on that page. 
• Write a letter to yourself. If you're not sure what to say, I'd encourage you to copy the questions below, paste them into your letter, and then answer them as honestly as you can.
• Now pick the date to receive this letter to yourself. It can be a year from now or many years from now. As long as your email account is still active, the letter will be sent to you. Making the letter private means that nobody else ever sees any part of it. Making it public simply means that others can read the message, but it appears as an anonymous message without any information that identifies who you are. 
• Send your message and respond to the confirmation email sent to you (to keep people from misusing the service). 

---------- copy/past below into futureme.org ----------

Right now, what provides the greatest contentment in my life?

What provides the greatest discontent?

I hope the future me is more...

I hope the future me is less...

What relationship would I most like to see change?

What is one significant thing I could do to improve that relationship, even if nothing else changed?

Will I do it?

One thing I want to tell the future me before I go:

---------- copy/past above into futureme.org ----------

That's all. A year from now, you'll get a letter from the one-year-younger you. In-between now and then, I hope you'll experience some good changes. 

Tim Tedder

Twas' two days after Christmas and all through the house, all people were moving including the mouse.  Exchanges were made and thank you's were said in hopes of avoiding a mess.
Hurt feelings were spared and graciousness shared all for the sake of the cause.
The cause is of peace and peace is of God so let the season of peace rest in your heart.

Merry Christmas!

Melissa

Christmas is less than a week away and I’m already looking beyond the holiday to the year ahead.  Clients of mine have been through very rough sledding this last year, due in part to the perilous economic times we live in.  Jobs are in short supply, and good jobs seem to be almost non-existent.  However, Christmas provides a good environment for perspective.  The man Jesus came to this earth in dire economic times, to a family extremely poor with no hope of any dramatic improvement in their circumstances.  He was born in a stable… with neither position nor influence that would allow them to enjoy anything close to being in an adequate environment for the birth of a child.  And his life after he was born was immediately in danger from a madman who governed the land in which he was born.  Perilous times indeed!

But the Good News of Christ’s birth still speaks to our hearts even two millennia after the actual event.  Out of desperation comes hope; out of discouragement comes wonder; and out of confusion comes wisdom.  Regardless of your circumstances this Christmas season, Jesus still provides us with perspective.  He still calls us to a life of faith, hope, and love, and His birth is the most poignant reminder of God’s overwhelming love for us.  And, all believers still exclaim along with the Apostle Peter, “Where else can we go?  You have the words of eternal life!”  So here’s to a Christmas where our thoughts are turned from ourselves and our own personal problems and predicaments, to the recounting of God’s blessings and a view ahead to the hope He alone can give us.  May you enjoy a Christmas with a view to eternity, and be reminded not only of the wisdom of Jesus, but also of the loving sacrifice He was for us all.  Merry Christmas!

Jim